What is this Buzzword called Self-Esteem?

Self-esteem involves how much a person values themselves and appreciates their own worth and importance. Someone with healthy self-esteem is able to feel good about their character and qualities and take pride in their abilities, skills, and accomplishments. Self-esteem is the result of comparing how we'd like to be and what we'd like to accomplish, with how we actually see ourselves.

Everyone experiences problems with self-esteem at certain times in their lives. How a person feels about him/her self can be related to many different factors, such as environment, body image, expectations of self, and experiences and accomplishments. For example, if a person has had problems in their family, has had to deal with difficult relationships, or sets unrealistic standards for her/himself, this can lead to low self-esteem.

Recognizing that you can improve your self-esteem is a great first step in doing just that. Learning the difference between what can hurt self-esteem and what can build it is also important. Then, with a little effort, a person can really improve the way one feels about oneself, i.e. self-esteem!

An example of what can harm self esteem is what many people call the "inner critic". This booming voice in your head will find fault with everything you do. Some people have modeled their inner critic's voice after a critical parent or teacher whose acceptance was important to them. The good news is that this inner critic can be retrained, and because it now belongs to you, you can be the one to decide that the inner critic will only give constructive feedback from now on.

Another culprit of low self-esteem are thinking errors. These are distorted thoughts that a person can have about themselves, the world, and others. Once a person learns about their distorted thoughts, they can actively make changes to a more reality based way of thinking which in turn increases self-esteem.

Finally learning what unrealistic expectations you have for yourself and how the inner critic and thinking errors tie together with these expectations is an integral part of what affects your self-esteem. Do you wish you were thinner? Smarter? More popular? A better athlete? It’s important to recognize what you can and can’t change, and work towards accomplishments rather than perfection

If you want to improve your self-esteem, here are some steps you can take to start empowering yourself:

• Think about what you're good at and what you enjoy, and build on those abilities. Take pride in new skills you develop and talents you have. Share what you can do with others.
• Exercise! You will relieve stress, and be healthier and happier.
• Stop thinking negative thoughts about yourself. When you catch yourself being too critical, counter it by saying something positive about yourself.
• Take pride in your opinions and ideas! Don't be afraid to voice them.
• Make a Gratitude List! Each day, write down three things about yourself that make you happy.
• Set realistic goals. Think about what you'd like to accomplish, then make a plan for how to do it. Stick with your plan and keep track of your progress. If you realize that you're unhappy with something about yourself that you can change, then start today. If it's something you can't change (like your height), then start to work toward loving yourself the way you are.
• Beware the perfectionist! Are you expecting the impossible? Goals for yourself should be realistic.
• Make a contribution. Feeling like you're making a difference can do wonders to improve self-esteem.
• Have fun! Enjoy spending time with the people you care about and doing the things you love.

Self-esteem plays a role in almost everything you do. People with high self-esteem enjoy life much more, are less stressed and tend to have happier, healthier relationships. They tend to find it easier to deal with mistakes, disappointments, and failures, and are more likely to stick with something until they succeed. Improving self-esteem takes work, but the reward is feeling good about yourself and your accomplishments and leading a healthier, happier life.

It's never too late to build or improve self-esteem. A therapist can help you to understand why you feel the way you do and most importantly

WHAT TO DO ABOUT IT!