Tips for Couples Arguing Over Finances

• Decide to work as a team.

• Figure out what money comes in and what money goes out.

- There are many good computer programs or keep track manually.
- If need be give yourselves 2 weeks to a month to collect information.
- Call a truce and don't fight during this time period.

• During this truce sit down separately and make a goals list of what you would like your money to do for you, your partner, and your family.

- List both short and long term goals.

• Make a date and sit down with all your materials including your goals list.

• Share your list with each other looking for similarities and agreements.

• Look at your income and expenses together (keep in mind similarities from goals list).

• Do the math - add up all the income and all the expenses and subtract the total expenses from the total income.

• Decide together what stays and what must go if budget comes up in red.

• Plan who writes the checks as well as when.

• Make a monthly date to review budget (to keep on track).

• Make sure you are not fighting over underlying emotional issues such as control, power, safety, security, etc. (a therapist can help with this).